i feel like i may have given Sir the feeling that nothing he did during our scene was right. That is the farthest thing from the truth.
In the previous posts, i've focused on what stood out to me. i think those things stand out because they are different from what i am used to. This post will focus on the positive aspects of our scene.
Sir's concern for my safety and comfort was extremely important to not only my enjoyment of the scene, but also to my state of mind during the scene. The fact that He cared to check on me, to see how i was doing, to check some things himself because He recognized that i'm stubborn and will endure things without complaint means an awful lot to me.
The simple touch of His hand on my body was enough to send my senses skyrocketing toward orgasm. From the moment He touched my neck to secure the collar, my skin cried out to be caressed by Him. The memory of the feel of His touch is STILL giving me tremors and aftershocks.
There are things i wish now i had done during O/our scene.
i wish i had touched Him. i wish i would have been reckless and given in to the desire to thread my fingers into His hair, to feel His skin under my hands.
i wish i had more fully surrendered to Him. i think i was trying to prove something to myself and "impress" Him with my control. i wish now i hadn't done that. i look forward to our next scene so that i may simply be His without the control games i was playing with myself.
And in the discussions since O/our scene, i wish i had not been so touchy about semantics. i believe i might have frightened Him with my adherence to a certain understanding of particular words. i wish i had done a better job of explaining myself the first time.
i think its time for me to go to bed now.