Another moved entry.

there was something inherently different about MasterJD when he called to say he was almost to the house. His tone of voice on the phone, asking me if i was naked and sounding just a bit peeved when i wasn't, was very different than it had been at his home or on the phone prior to this time. i wondered at the time if he remembered that he told me it was okay to wear something. Naked or close were his words, i think. i chose close.
We spent a bit of time chatting in the living room, getting acclimated to each other, to R being there, to the cats, etc. i heard the change in his voice when he said he'd like a drink. i'd asked several times if he wanted something, but i almost think he said no to those offers so he could order me to get him something (note to self--ask him about this).
When he said, "let's get started," my heart jumped and stuttered. i had no idea what he expected of me and the frown on his face left me feeling that no matter what, i was already doing something wrong. i knelt in front of him and bowed my head to accept the collar i'd given him when he arrived. he fussed at me about my hair. i knelt, waiting, while he dug into his bag.
He pulled out the set of clamps that i knew would be different than any that i'd ever felt before. i'd tested these on my hand in his home the first night we met and found they had a heck of a bite. i was frightened. i was used to a slower approach to everything than he was taking and i felt the apprehension clawing at me like a small animal.
He pushed the strap of my gown off my shoulder and pulled my breast from behind the shield of the gown. i closed my eyes and waited for the bite of the clamp. i knew from talking to MasterJD that he was usually pretty rough with his subs. my heart was thumping against my throat, but the expected snap of pain when the clamp closed didn't come.
Instead there was a slow-building pressure and a blossom of heat. my breath came in fast pants and my head dropped back. Before i had time to fully recover, he was reaching for my other breast and the same pressure and heat came from that nipple. He gave me a moment to adjust and bring my breathing back to normal before cliping the strings attached to the clamps together with a heavy snap link. This was lowered and the clamps became even tighter.
For a few moments, he ran his hands over my breasts. i finally told him that my feet were going to sleep and i'd be unable to stay kneeling for much longer. The irritation reappeared. my heart thumped hard and tried to stop.
He told me to rise and finish disrobing. i was certain that the fact i'd worn anything had annoyed him and the red satin panties, my favorites, should have been left in the drawer. i removed the last bit of clothing and stood uncertain.
There were no cuffs on my wrists or ankles and that made me feel far more naked than my lack of clothing. i felt untethered, adrift and my axiety cranked up a notch.
MasterJD asked me if i knew what the "slave position" was. i admitted that i did not. He had me kneel on the floor, stretch out my body so my butt was high in the air and my arms and head were on the floor. Every movement made the weight from the clamps move, tightening them it seemed. When i lay against the carpet, the rough nylon further irritated my nipples, making me try to find a way to keep them off the carpet.
Using the crop i had to this point tried to ignore, MasterJD tapped my thighs, telling me to open my legs. Intellectually, i knew i could simply stand up and end this, but i didn't. i did as he asked, spreading my legs until there was no impediment to his access to me. i was still unbound and felt very alone.
I'll have to add more to this later...my brain is fuzzy on everything else in this part of the scene except MasterJD's admonishment of my misbehavior.