Stupid Me

Why am I surprised when people do exactly what I teach them to do? If I teach people that it's okay to treat me as though I have no value, why should I be shocked when they take me at my word and do so?

Coming down...

I'm still coming down front the 2011 MsC. I hate Con Drop with a passion and thought perhaps this year wouldn't be so bad. I was mistaken.
This Year's conference marked a milestone for me. I didn't cry. For the first time in the four years I have attended, I didn't find myself reduced to a blubbering mess at any time during the event. If I thought for a moment that it was because I had such a good time that there was not time to cry, I'd be happy. The truth, however, is somewhat different.
Coming home yesterday, I realized I felt detached and separate from the event. This was something I hadn't experienced before. Normally I'm so connected that I can't handle the emotions and issues. This year there was no connection.
I enjoyed the couple of classes I attended. It was good to see the folks I see only at the MsC. Ultimately, however, I wasn't really present.
I've stepped back from the community since June because my jobs make it difficult for me to make it to munches and other events. The MsC showed me that maybe a larger break is in order.
The back biting, the sniping, the politics of the community are simply not worth the little free time I have. My friends and family are all that keeps me tied to any part of the community.
So while I don't think I'm going anywhere for now, you won't see me as often. If you notice I'm gone, email or text me. We'll do lunch.