Monday, March 28, 2011

My Tarot Spread

I drew this tarot spread today:

Three Cards Spread

Past:

Three of Pentacles

Success through time and effort, mastery of a skill, self-improvement, artistic ability, dignity, nobility, rank, power, achieving perfection.

Present:

The Hanged Man

Self-sacrifice, surrendering, letting go, acceptance, suspension, patience, non-action, new point of view.

Future:

Knight of Cups

Romeo, romance, new excitements, opportunities or offers, a dreamer, intelligence.

Generated from Galaxy Tarot on Android.

My Tarot Spread

I drew this tarot spread today:

Relationship Spread

Relationship Situation:

King of Cups

Goodness, kindness, liberality, generosity, patience, emotional openness, unselfish aid, diplomacy rather than force, a man who is "all heart", a new but mature love.

Your Conscious Level:

Ace of Cups

Joy, love, beauty, good health, the beginning, new possibilities, new ideas.

On the Level of their Conscious Mind:

Three of Cups

Joyful social contact, celebrations, success, agreement, hospitality, general harmony, good fortune in love. Sometimes associated with birth, may signify a need for calm and quiet.

Your Emotional Level:

King of Wands

Knowledge, education, good news, leadership qualities, strength of will, motivation to start new projects, goal-oriented action, promotion, inheritance, a man of status and wealth.

On the level of their Emotions:

The Moon

Lack of clarity, darkness, tension, doubt, deception, confusion, illusion, apprehension, psychological conflict.

Your Behavior or Attitude:

Five of Cups

Sorrow, disappointment, or loss of a loved one. May signify a tendency to "cry over spilt milk", failure to open your eyes and see the good in a situation.

Their Outside Behavior or Attitude:

Eight of Wands

Immediate understanding or action, observation, direction, hitting the mark, unexpected impulse, overcoming old patterns.

Generated from Galaxy Tarot on Android.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Horoscope for Pisces - March 7, 2011

It's finally time to take your latest endeavor to the next level -- so if you are in a burgeoning romantic relationship, plan a date where the two of you can really let loose and confess your real feelings for each other. Go beyond the old dinner and movie routine -- how about cooking a meal together? If you are still settling into a new job, the timing is perfect for you to deliver your latest new idea. Plan to bring it up in the next meeting you attend.
---
Sent with Android Horoscope Widget: http://swisscodemonkeys.appspot.com/app/horoscope

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Horoscope for Pisces - March 2, 2011

Continue on your journey for more substance in your life today -- skip out on the gossip sessions and go read a challenging book. If you feed your mind complex ideas, you will encourage the development of more complex emotions. The idea of endurance is extremely important today, so give more attention to concepts that have stood the test of time. (Consider, 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you' and 'Never judge a book by its cover.') Stop taking shortcuts in communication.
---
Sent with Android Horoscope Widget: http://swisscodemonkeys.appspot.com/app/horoscope

Love, sex, and service

Love, sex, and service

A quote from submissive journey prompts got me thinking. I've often told partners that I am uncomfortable with emotionally disconnected sexual contact. I want to know you, be known by you, before I allow you access to the intimate areas of my body - and that includes my heart, soul, and intellect.

A dear friend reminded me recently that our most potent sexual organ is our brain. How I could have forgotten that is amazing to me. I know I am most stimulated by someone with whom I have an intellectual connection. Someone who can get into my head will surely give and receive far more satisfying sexual gratification than those who do not take the time to connect with me in that way.

Another part of the original quote which got me started today dealt with the vulnerability inherent in giving someone your love. When we love, we open ourselves to another. Few can hurt us more easily or more deeply than those whom we love. But if one does not become vulnerable, one cheats him or herself as well is his or he partner. Despite the pain of past relationships, I will make myself vulnerable to someone again. How can I not? How can I go through life living behind a barricade? I cannot. I must open my heart and soul as I have in the past. I must give myself to others. I must be vulnerable or risk existing rather than living.

If I am not vulnerable, I cannot serve. Service requires trust to be given to the served and accepted from the served. There is vulnerability on both sides of the equation. Power exchange relationships, it would seem, begin with vulnerability and continue with vulnerability. Transparency must be there on both sides. Both partners must be open and must be receptive. Both must trust and both must love.

Yes, I said love. Even owners must love. I've reached a point in my life where I see through the silly, adolescent definitions of love that plagued my life. Now love is that place of safety and vulnerability where another human being has made a decision to let me into his or her walls and I have done the same. Lust is great, but love is life-changing.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Smacked between the eyes

Smacked between the eyes
I knew that the last owner hadn't read my books. What I didn't realize was that he was so unaware of who I am that he wasn't even aware of my pen name.
Today, this person posted on a FetLife board asking about the Servant's Escape weekend. I messaged him privately to point out that he could have asked me the question or read the website to get the information he asked for on the board. He called me later, to "clear up any misunderstanding." Fine. Whatever.
The worst of the phone call was that he actually said, "I'm not familiar with the person running the event." The website has my pen name on it and A PICTURE OF ME.
It always hurt me when he and I were together that he didn't care to read my books. Now I wonder if he ever heard anything I actually said. How could you be involved with me and not know my pen name? How could you be involved with me and not read what I write about the kind of relationship we have?
I spent a few hours on the phone the other night talking with a friend. She ordered me not to ever again settle for a relationship in favor of waiting for "the" relationship. I agreed that I will not settle again. I deserve so much more than what I've settled for in the past.
She also helped me more clearly see how what I write and what I share through teaching in the community is service, and valuable service at that. I will not hide behind modesty any longer. Nor will I fade into the woodwork. I will learn to be a better self promoter if for no other reason than because others deserve to benefit from my service to the community.